Marketing for IT Company Founder Discovers Time Travel Device in Ransacked Office!
Sands of Time
“Merlin, you coming with me to preserve the marketing for IT my business has been struggling with over the last several months, or are you going to just sit on your duff and play games?”
“I think I’ll stay here.”
“But in the other universe— don’t you want the women?”
“It’s not another universe, Johannes, it’s another timeline… and a timeline where I don’t wear plaid, flannel, argyle, or some combination of the three is a timeline not for me. Also, it’s not really another timeline, but it is, but it isn’t— you’ll figure it out. Go, my friend. I have another level to beat.”
“What’s the game you’re playing?” Johannes leaned to look over Merlin’s shoulder.
“NO! You mustn’t see what I’m playing!”
“NO, I SAID!” Merlin’s rage was suddenly so great his comb-over was suddenly on end.
“Okay, okay,” Johannes, demurred and left Merlin’s laboratory for his office.
After jogging up the stairs and unlocking the door with his smartphone, Johannes found everything as disarrayed as before. There was the hourglass. Johannes rushed over and lifted it from where it had fallen when David did the same only a short while ago.
The World Changed
Instantaneously, reality became an inverse property of imagination, and Johannes found himself inside a crystalline bubble surrounded by buildings rising and falling in time to a ubiquity of foliage doing the same, while the occasional strange animal stomped about the premises. “Johannes! I thought you’d never come!”
It was David, recently hired marketing manager of MSP SEO Factory. “David!” Johannes cried, “I’ve found you! And lost my office, apparently. Where is this? Where are you? I can’t see you!”
“A world-between-the-worlds time machine spaceship,” David replied. “I’ve been in here a long, long time.” David revealed himself from behind some translucent bulkhead. He had a beard to the middle of his chest and tattered clothes. “It’s been hard to do marketing for IT from here…” and he was laughing like a mad-man.
“That’s the laugh you had when you met me several months ago!”
“Was it? Was it now!” David was giggling again. “We’re trapped, boss!”
“Nonsense,” Johannes replied, “Here, I’ll just grab the hourglass,” and he lifted it up. The bottom of the translucent, inter-dimensional time machine stretched with it as though time and space were a sticky goo reflecting everything in similitude to mercury. It began to drip across Johannes. “See? This is some kind of time machine. Merlin told me.”
“He’s one of my tech guys, specializes in physics,” Johannes temporized, “So, this is what my competition’s been after.”
“How do you work it?”
“I don’t know… hourglass! Take me to a month before David showed up, the office of Erdy Michaels.” In a flash, everything changed, and there was Erdy, putting him into one of those little office-sized putting greens.
Johannes handed David the hourglass chuckling, jumped out of the machine, cried, “This is what you get for black-hat tactics when you’re marketing for IT, Erdy!” then gave Michaels a nuclear wedgie and knocked him over. “Next time, don’t ransack my office because your business doesn’t provide
• Trustworthy Solutions
• Superior SEO
• Exceptional Content
…and much more!”
Then Johannes jumped back into the inter-dimensional machine by picking up the hourglass from the floor while Erdy Michaels looked positively bewildered.